PAXAus

I keep forgetting to make a video but I thought while I'm here I'll blog about PAX. I had a blast. I cosplayed as Quiet  from MGS5. I didn't get to bring in my nerf gun because it still had the firing mechanism intact. But this I had a good time. I spent a lot of time at the world of tanks booth. I actually won a couple of prizes there, a Plantonics Rig headset and 6000 worth of gold. Also my friends Warrick and Fallacy and me got to play the game mode bumper tank on stage.

The other booth I spent a lot of time at what the league of legends booth.Some epic battles and some major fan live there.  

I spent my day on a mission to win or collect as much free stuff as possible. That was the mood I was in. The boys played plenty of the 2K bball and wrestling. 

I didn't stay there all day I guess I'm just not a fan boy enough or crazy enough to sit and wait there in line to play games or lab play or console play.  The lines were over 1 hour long! 

I will try my best to make a video. If I don't enjoy my photos

Meet you local...

So this morning at station, a volunteer was handing out flyers before I got to even read said piece of paper. He was like that's Dan your local Labor member, which then lead to a force hey how are you. Later I realized after walking to the train platform the volunteer was for the Liberal party and he was handing out anti Labour Party propaganda.  At that moment when I was handed the flyer then told that was Dan. I honestly thought he was pro Dan. So pretty much what I took away from this whole morning was the volunteer had a very bad tactic because I honestly thought at the time I was holding pro Labor party propaganda....And for God sake when using a guillotine cut on 90degree angles!  

I just want to say I have no ties to either party. I am not pro Labor or Liberal. I was just re-telling the morning events. 

irrational illusions dissipate into thin air

Unfortunately, we live in a world governed by rationality, and while love may be irrational, and we may manage to make it work for some time, the real world always catches up with us and our irrational illusions dissipate into thin air

That friend

Now I'm not saying I love everyone and lets hold hands and skip through the meadows, because I can be ruthless. This my sound really egocentric of me but if I find out that you have been a horrible f***ker behind my back and saying crap about me, then you can go to the other side of the fence, I heard the grass is greener over there because all the the BULLSH*T you and the people you'll meet have.

But to everyone on my side of the fence. How I love thee.

I've been blessed enough in life to have some many people who love me. But it wouldn't be complete if I didn't have that friend.

Not everyone has friendships the way I do. I know I can be quite harsh when it comes to friends because everyone starts out as a friend and then slowly you have close friends and for the special few there is the we are pretty much each other's shadow!

There are certain people in my life that I couldn't live without, because they can always make me smile, laugh and cry. They are the people that I call upon when I want to do something dumb. They are the people that I don't need to explain why i'm being to socially weird or unacceptable. They are the people who know me and are still here.

Last year I love a few friends I thought I was going to have for life. You think after 10 years of friendship it would mean something, but if some b*tch want to screw that all up good luck to you. Stay on your side of the fence... But luckily enough for me that just made room for someone much more awesome.

The friends I have now I am blessed with, I'm lucky to have you in my life.

I love you guys so much  

Starting again

So finally I have found the motivation to get fit! 

My new found love Yoga. 

I've always been able to so some of the poses & asanas, just lucky like that.  Really after getting pretty sick recently I decided to do something to make myself feel better.

Its just one step at a time.

Hopefully by the end of summer I will have heaps more photos to show off.

October, Australia’s Breast Cancer Awareness Month

Seriously if you need help feeling your boobies, I'm here for you because that's the kind of friend I am.
October, Australia’s Breast Cancer Awareness Month,

Holding On

I keep holding on, holding on to you, the idea of you, the idea of us, the idea that it could all work out and we could be so happy.

but i am fool.

As soon as i'm without you the realisation that you are just a dream, that i can't hold on forever.

reality is calling.

nodus tollens

nodus tollens n. the realization that the plot of your life doesn’t make sense to you anymore—that although you thought you were following the arc of the story, you keep finding yourself immersed in passages you don’t understand, that don’t even seem to belong in the same genre—which requires you to go back and reread the chapters you had originally skimmed to get to the good parts, only to learn that all along you were supposed to choose your own adventure.
Found : http://www.dictionaryofobscuresorrows.com/post/48395591256/nodus-tollens

Some days I feel a lot like that.

it feels like the plot to my life has already been written and i'm off doing a side quest.

Nonchalant

Nonchalant - not how I envisioned this word to be spelt but Okay 

Oxytocin and Dopamine

There isn't a day that goes past when I'm not missing you.

Have you ever had that one person in your life, you always missed, even when you were together because you know that you might have to part, even if it just for a short while.

I would compare this love to a puppy or a dog.

The way my dog is so happy when I'm home and all he wants is a cuddle. He doesn't need much just a cuddle and some love. He is happy just being in my presence. He waits at the door when I go into a room he can't and he knows when I leave through that front door I'm gone, but I'll be back and I do love him. But I know he misses me, as he is waiting at home for me to return.

Maybe thats why I love dogs sooo much, I guess I can really relate to the way they love and trust. I think I'm very similar. So I guess, puppy love isn't so bad. It's better than a cat, I can take it or leave it, now feed me. Not saying that I missed you or anything but don't leave again....I'm only saying this because I'm hungry, meow feed me. A cat never admits they need you.

I know I'm in love because vasopressin, norepinephrine, serotonin and my favourites oxytocin and dopamine, make me feel that it is so. Pretty much the chemical imbalance in my brain makes my heart beat faster when I'm near you and my face just smile when I see you and as much as I get mad or as much as you might hurt me. I find a way to forgive you, and that to me is real love.

I might say I love your eyes or your smile, but really that's just what attracted me to you when we first met. To be completely honest I love you, everything about you, even the darker side of you. It's you as a complete being that I am in love with. 

So just because I haven't said it in a while doesn't mean I don't love you or that I don't miss you.

I love you more than I can ever show you and more than you could ever understand. I miss you with every bit of me, every thought that passes through my mind, every moment of every day, I miss and long for you.

image source http://instagram.com/harlowandsage

Time is precious, waste it wisely.

Where did all the time go?

It's already July 30!!!

Time just slipped through my fingers.

Time it such a funny thing, and one thing we all forget is that we are all time travellers.

Days turn into months and months into years. I'll like to ask you when was your last moment, your last memory. 

Not everything we do, we remember and reflect on, but what you do remember, are you proud? Are you happy with the choices you made?

Time is precious, waste it wisely.

In a moment

In a moment everything can change. 

One moment it can be sunny and the next its pissing down.

Today I was disappointed, recently I've been doing that a lot. Even my iPad starts suggesting it as soon as I write dis.... 

I hate it when I let people back in and well, they prove me to be a fool. 

My mind goes along the lines of see see! You kicked them out for a reason. Now you know why again.

I hope it scars

Did I learn my lesson?

Only time will tell.

I know you're no good for me but I cant stop. But one day you will hurt me enough that you will break my spirt, you will break me. I would have learnt the hard way but I might then just maybe let you go.

I want a puppy

So I want a dog again.... I say again because I have and adorable pomeranian at home, but he is 14 and any time I ask if he wants to go for walkies, he pees on something. He's old, he doesn't care and he is just plain sassy.

And another time, more recently Bichon x Poodle but she is living with my ex. It was better for her that way just not for me. I miss her soo.

So i'm currently on the hunt for a Bichon x poodle again.

I want a puppy soo bad, I would love to re-home a dog but i think it might need to be after i get a pup, for the moment can only get one dog.

I've picked a name and everything, well i've picked a few names, hopefully i can introduce you one day to my new family memeber.

the picture i've uploaded is Archer, Bichon x Poodle

New start

So I'm back, another attempt at blogging and vlogging and everything in between, lets see how this goes...

I update instagram often, that doesn't take much to do. Hopefully I will have something brilliant to say here and often. I will start Vlogging more, unsure if I will use my normal youtube channel.

Until next time.

I should youtube more

life

Today I thought i should write something. I have a million thoughts running through my mind, about the people i care about, the people i love. Im lucky enough to be loved and to love. but its never as simple as that. and that is what makes it a shame. Somedays I want to just tell everyone I love you, somedays i can bearly find the strength to just tell you. Once upon a time it was simple.

Happy valentines day

Keeping it short

Love you all

Days you wish you rode a bike

Melbourne traffic is horrible, I'm sure it's bad every where that it is over populated. 

Days like these I wish I rode a bike

Footy is back!

So I've never been into watching any sport. I love playing sport but I've never been one to watch sport.

But over the years, I have found my self watching a game here there. However recently I'm watching, listening and sometimes even talking sport.

The funny things you do for love...

So I had to endure though cricket season and all I ever think of when I think cricket is the lyrics "I don't like cricket, oh no I love it"

Cricket to me is a great background sport for a BBQ and honestly watching the news highlight of cricket is pretty much all you need from the cricket. The scores, the catches and the run outs. 

But nooooooo apparently we need to know the score constantly, and the cricket is on tv at home and when we are in the car it's on the radio. And there is sooo much cricket! The Ashes, T20, 1 day, 2 day and 4 days. 

I made it for another year throughout cricket season, and the poor English team but done and dusted. Btw it's actually still going on Australia is now playing South Africa.

But guess what's back, back again, footy's back, don't bother about telling a friend they already know.

And so it begins with the NAB challenge.

The NAB challenge. 18 games 18 days for nothing!! No prizes, no cup, no trophies, no giant fake cheque .

AFL took away the NAB cup, scrap the whole thing and have given us the NAB challenge that should be the NAB not so challenging. 

Okay there is a challenge, just not for the players. The challenge is sit through 18 non stop days of meaningless pre-season footy for me anyways. For Nate is probably so exciting, to see the teams who recently got a new coach preform like St. Kilda or Essendon kinda, and for his dream team.

Team will play 2 games in total, and they are playing it all over Australia. First game Geelong vs Collingwood, played in Geelong but they even play in Alice Springs!! Who plays in Alice Springs.

To me this whole thing is just to ensure that one of the key players is out on injury, for the majority of the season and plus the rules aren't the same!

And if you're worried real footy starts Friday, March 14 with Collingwood versus Fremantle at Etihad.

I leave with you common saying that you might hear.

Common.

Kick it.

Kick the bloody thing.

He's a unit.

He's don't nothing.

OMG.

I should YouTube more.

Cho0kieness

Must write something

Forcefully trying to blog...

Must write something...

And done

Jokes

But seriously I don't know what to blog about so I tell you about what I'm currently doing.

Currently I'm watching a game of men's basketball.  A very sloppy games on the players and referees

So I understand that being a ref is hard. I've done it before and I know that you can only call what you see and saw. But honestly good referees are hard to come by.  Also getting two 16 year old girls to ref a men's basketball game isn't the best idea. I honestly happy watching her cry. Grow up child. Anyways...

The team that the boys play was scrappy and it's a shame because it brings the level of the game down. Not much else to add

I think I might keep this blog short 

I should YouTube more

Cho0kieness

Day two. I should be so proud

So I have managed to pull out my iPad again for a second day to blog to no one. Super!

Running late :( 

Was kept back at work which is horrible because I have a chiro and a myotherapist apt that I am now running late for. 

Poo I know first world problems much....

So I recently was asked for relationship advice... To be honest I'm not the right person for that.

Yes I've had relationships, but no way am I an expect or a role model. I'm pretty sure I'm a mess with a really nice dress.

The reason why I was asked because I'm currently in a functioning relationship with a very wonderful man. Who loves and cherishes me. How that qualifies me as advice giver I don't know...

The question that was asked was how did I find the one?

First of all I didn't find anything!! I still can't find my house keys!

I think to be honest love found me but only because I was in the right place and time.

Now this isn't some spill about wait and you will find the one, this is more of a love and be happy with your self first kinda thing.

For the first time in my life I was happy with my self. I was finally happy with who I was and where I was in life. 

And then he strolled into my life and I have never been happier. 

So my advice is that you need to be happy with yourself and who you are and what you stand for.

Now let me say that maybe I'm wrong but I honestly think if you go banging down doors looking for the one. Yeah maybe you will find the one but is that how you really want to go about it because your going to increase the amount of people you date for all the wrong reasons.

Now dating people for the wrong reason I'm all about that! The first two boys I ever dated (14yr me) I did it because I wanted a boyfriend and I liked the idea.

The idea of some one, now that I know all about. I am the worst offender for the idea of someone. 

I still miss the idea of someone, who they are in my mind is so much more amazing then they are in real life. 

Many of my exs are better as an idea. Now it can be stated that I might be to fussy and picky and it's all in my head. But hey want are you going to do about it?

I think this is the long self written blog by me ever. 

Hopefully this make sense. 

This whole blog makes no sense other than the rambling thoughts in my head.  

And if you have gotten this far omg, impressive comment so I can thank you 

Anyways until tomorrow,

I should YouTube more 

Cho0kieness

Here I am again

I know this wont last, I don't like writing my grammar and spelling is horrible and I make no sense. Plus no one reads this but hello!

So I've started this fun new thing. Lies it's not fun nor new.... I'm not catching the train home :(

I hate the train and I hate the way people stare!

To the lady next to me reading what I'm writing with your ugly judgemental face. Hello 

Hello, is it me you looking for? I can see it in your eyes I can see it in your smile...

Side tracked 

So not many stops left but I just wanted to start and start doing something maybe I might keep this up for a bit or maybe for a while and I'll get sponsors and I'll make millions..... Probs not

But anyways hello internet!

I should YouTube more 

Cho0kieness